


Ugly

by MorganaNK



Category: Inspector Lynley Mysteries (TV), Inspector Lynley Mysteries - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-19
Updated: 2021-03-27
Packaged: 2021-03-28 19:00:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 4,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30144108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorganaNK/pseuds/MorganaNK
Summary: When Barbara turns to Tommy in her hour of need the final wall between them begins to come down.A 'MorganaNK is cruel to Barbara yet again' fic that I started over a year ago.
Relationships: Barbara Havers/Thomas Lynley
Comments: 33
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Property of Elizabeth George and the BBC, no copyright infringement intended

I alighted from the cab, pulling my keys from my pocket and heading towards the front door of my house in Eaton Terrace. It had been a long and boring night, and I was glad to be home.

I was preoccupied, so it wasn’t until I nearly tripped over her that I noticed Barbara sitting on my doorstep.

“What are you doing here?”

She didn’t look up at me, and I wondered if my tone of voice had been too harsh. I hadn’t meant it to be, I was just surprised to find her sitting there. I crouched down so that I was at her level, “Barbara?”

She still wouldn’t look at me, so I hooked my finger under her chin and made her raise her head, gasping at what I saw. Barbara’s face was bruised, and one of her eyes had swollen shut.

“What on earth! What’s happened?”

“Don’t look at me, I’m ugly.”

Barbara tried to duck her head again but I stopped her. “What happened Barbara, tell me, please.”

“I was carjacked, outside the takeaway, I tried to fight them off, they took my bag and phone as well. I had nowhere to go. I’m sorry.”

I slid my arm around her shoulder and hugged her close, and it was then that I realised she was soaking wet and shivering.

“How long have you been sitting here?”

“I don’t know, an hour, maybe two.”

Standing, I pulled her to her feet, “let’s get you inside so that you can warm up and then we can call the police.”

She looked at me sadly, “you’re forgetting something, we are the police.”

“We don’t have to do everything ourselves Barbara, let uniform earn their money.”

…I had herded Barbara upstairs to my bedroom, giving her my robe to change into while I ran her a hot bath. While she soaked away her aches and pains, I made a call to the station and asked them to notify uniform to be on the lookout for her car.

After an hour had passed and she hadn’t reappeared I headed up to my room to check on her. Quietly opening the door, I stopped dead at the sight before me. Barbara curled up asleep in my bed.

I left as quietly as I’d arrived.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Apologies for the brief chapter... for some reason my laptop has become possessed by a demon, I am having to run repair software every time I start it, and it takes over an hour to fix before I can use it... saving up for a new one, and have uploaded the document to Drive, so if needs be I can write it one fingered on my phone._

…I woke, feeling as if I had been sleeping on a cloud. As I began to focus, I realised that I wasn’t in my bed, and that this certainly wasn’t my room. I attempted to scramble out of bed, and then immediately regretted it.

Groaning, I lay back down, just as the bedroom door opened.

“Oh, you’re awake.”

“I am, sorry for taking liberties.”

“What on earth do you mean?”

“You invite me to have a bath to warm up and…” I gestured at the bed I was still in.

“Barbara, you haven’t done anything wrong. You were tired, there was a bed available, you fell asleep.”

“But it’s your bed.”

“And?”

“I fell asleep in your bed!”

“Exactly, you fell asleep. It’s not like you crept into my house and climbed into bed with me while I was sleeping, not that I would make this much fuss if you did.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. Now, I was coming to see how you were feeling, so, how are you?”

“Sore, angry, and confused.”

“I get the first two, but why confused?”

“They stole my bloody car! I mean, it’s just a Vauxhall Astra hatchback, why on earth would they want that? It’s not worth anything, not like your Bristol.”

He clutched his chest, a wounded expression on his face.

“Havers, my car, how could you?”

“I don’t mean that I want what happened to me to happen to you, but it would make more sense.”

He sat down next to me, “I’m joking with you, but I also think the Bristol would be a little conspicuous for the average car jacker.”

“Hmm, all right, I’ll give you that.”

“It was just a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I hate that you’ve been hurt, but it could have been so much worse.”

“I’ll be a laughingstock.”

“No one laughed when I asked them to look out for your car, they just asked if you were okay, and you being okay is all that matters.”

“I’ll be fine in a couple of days, but right now I’m feeling each and every one of their blows.”

“You should get checked out by a doctor.”

“Do I have to?”

“Yes. I’ll go with you if you want me to.”

“I’m counting on it.”


	3. Chapter 3

…Fortunately, Barbara had no broken bones, just some nasty bruising. Reassured, we thanked the doctor and headed back to the Bristol. As we walked across the car park, Barbara became subdued.

“It’s good news that nothing’s broken.”

“Mmm.”

“Barbara?”

“No, it’s good news.”

I gently captured her wrist and made her stop walking. Stepping in front of her, I crouched down so I could look her in the eye.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Honestly.”

“If I didn’t know you, I might believe you.”

“I’m fine.”

“And I’m not the earl of Asherton! Be honest with me Barbara.”

“It just hit me, okay, they’ve got my address, my keys, my warrant card. They know everything about me. What I do for a living. Where to find me. All my friends contact details. Even without the assault, I feel completely violated.”

“It’s horrible what happened to you Barbara, but I thank any god that will listen that you got off as lightly as you did. We can change the locks on your flat, the insurance will help towards the cost of a new car, the force will issue you with a new phone.”

“That’s not going to give me mental security.”

“What would?”

“I don’t know! All I do know is that I’m scared to go home. How pathetic is that? I’m a police officer who is too scared to return to her flat in case they turn up there!”

“Then you can stay with me, for however long you need to.”

“You don’t want your work partner under your feet.”

“Barbara. Stop it.”

She stepped back from me, and for the second time in twenty-four hours, I wondered if my tone had been too harsh.

“Look, if I didn’t want you around, I wouldn’t have offered. I like you, I like having you around, even if my cutlery drawers do end up full of your knickers.”

“That could only happen if I had access to my clothes. Right now, the clothes you kindly washed and dried for me while I was snoozing in your bed are the only ones I have. My go-bag was in the car.”

“We’ll rectify that when we get into your flat tomorrow but, if for any reason we can’t, I’ll loan you some money until such time as you get new debit and credit cards. Now, is there anything we haven’t covered, or can we go home and get some sleep?”

“We can go home, but I’ll be sleeping in the spare room.”

“If you insist.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is for Francesca, who seems to have taken up mind reading! 😉

…I woke to find my arms wrapped around a warm body; my nose buried in a mess of red hair. It surprised me, because I knew for a fact, I had gone to bed alone. I wracked my brain, trying desperately to work out how Barbara had ended up in my bed. It wasn’t that I minded, it would just be nice to know.

She began to stir, and I braced myself for the explosion.

“Do you have to think so loudly?”

That threw me. She rolled over in my embrace.

“Is there something wrong, only you said if I crept into your house and climbed into your bed while you were sleeping you wouldn’t make a fuss. Didn’t you mean it?”

“I meant it, I’m just a little confused because you insisted that you were sleeping in the spare room.”

“I had a nightmare, so I decided to take you up on your offer. You also said you liked me and liked having me around.”

“I did. I do. I’m just a little confused, that’s all.”

“I can go if you want me to.”

“I don’t.”

“Then can we go back to sleep. I had a terribly busy day yesterday, and I’m not really a morning person so…”

I tightened my hold on her.

“Sleep.”

…The next time I woke she was still safely in my arms and I was still confused. 

Something had shifted between us, changed our relationship, but I wasn’t sure how. I also wasn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth. I had known for a while that my feelings for Barbara had moved from the friendly to something much more intense, I just hadn’t wanted to lose her from my life. Yet here she was, clothed in one of my t-shirts, and snuggled up against me in my bed. A relationship with Barbara was akin to walking through a minefield. I was going to have to tread very carefully.

Extricating myself from the human knot puzzle we had become, I headed to the bathroom. After using the facilities, I headed back to the bedroom to find Barbara waking up.

“Good morning.” I glanced at the bedside clock, “Sorry, good afternoon. Did you sleep well?”

“Mmm, I did, until someone disturbed me far too early by thinking.”

“I’m sorry about that.”

“You’re forgiven, or at least you will be if I get a decent cup of coffee.”

“Bed and breakfast?”

“No, bed and coffee. It’s too late for breakfast.”

“What about lunch?”

“Now you’re speaking my language!”

Throwing back the duvet, she clambered out of the bed. I stood, watching her, not quite believing what I was seeing, waiting for the moment when the alarm went off and I awoke to find that it was all just a beautiful dream.

The moment was shattered by a finger poking me in the ribs.

“Oi! You promised me coffee and lunch. I’m fading away here.”

Laughing, I hugged her briefly, then headed downstairs, her trailing along behind me.

…Tommy sipped his coffee while watching me eat. I couldn’t work out why he found me so enthralling, I looked as if I’d been in the ring with Tyson Fury and come off worse.

“Have I grown horns or something?”

“No.”

“Then why are you staring at me?”

“Honestly?”

“Yeah.”

“I keep waiting to wake up, or for you to vanish. This only ever happens in my dreams.”

“So, you dream about me wearing one of your tees and looking like I’ve lost a boxing match?”

“Wearing one of my t-shirts, yes. Covered in bruises, no, but I’d find you appealing if you were naked and covered in mud.”

“Is that one of your sexual fantasies; me naked and covered in mud?”

“Umm.”

“That tells me everything I needed to know.”

“You seem to have undergone a personality transplant since yesterday. One minute you’re apologising for falling asleep in my bed, the next you’re in that bed, snuggled in my arms.”

I shrugged, “I thought about what you said, that you wouldn’t mind me in your bed. When my particularly graphic nightmare woke me, I decided I was being silly. I know I feel safe in your arms ever since you held me outside the Queens Head in Suffolk all those years ago. We’ve been dancing around our feelings all these years, neither of us brave enough to make the first move. One of us had to stop being an idiot. You gave me the courage to do that. I know it’s completely out of character, but you have to agree, when something traumatic happens to either one of us, we lower our defences. On this occasion I destroyed mine completely. Hopefully that wasn’t a mistake.”

“It wasn’t.”

“Good, because there’s no going back from this. If you and I don’t work out…”

He stood, came round to my side of the table and tugged me to my feet. Brushing my hair back, he looked me in the eye.

“We’ve worked for ten years, that’s not going to change.”

“Then kiss me and seal the deal.”

I didn’t have to ask twice.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **CLIFF AHEAD!** _Author does not accept responsibility for any manicures damaged while reading_

”How is it I keep ending up in your bed?”

I absently ran a finger up and down her arm, “are you complaining?”

“Did it sound like a complaint?”

“Are you going to answer all my questions with a question?”

“Are you?”

My finger trailed down her body until I reached her waist, where I began to tickle her mercilessly. As she tried to squirm out of my grasp, I straddled her, pinning her arms above her head.

“You seem to have me at a slight disadvantage.”

“Really, after what we did earlier, I would have thought that this position was advantageous to the both of us.”

“You’re insatiable.”

“I repeat my question from a few minutes ago; are you complaining?”

Wiggling against me, she grinned wickedly, “not a chance.”

“Seems like I’m not the only one around her who’s insatiable.”

“I somehow doubt you’re complaining about that either.”

“I never would.”

“Well, now you’ve got me in this position, what are you planning to do with me?”

I lowered my head until my mouth was level with her ear and whispered, “guess.”

“How about I just tell you instead.”

“Go on then.”

“Fuck me.”

…Tommy rolled off me and onto his back, both of us breathing heavily.

“Wow.”

“Wow?”

“I’ll give you a full performance review once I get my breath back.”

“Will it include marks out of ten?”

“Why have I never met this cheeky side of you before?”

“He popped out occasionally.”

“He did? When?”

“Remember the script writer murder at Sir Stuart Stinhurst’s house?”

“The one where you went all Neanderthal Lynley over Helen?”

“Yes, but we’ll ignore that bit. We were driving and you said that I wouldn’t catch you getting naked on screen. Do you remember my response?”

“No.”

“I looked you up and down and said, shame.”

“You liked me even then?”

“Yes. You may have tried your hardest to appear unlovable, but there was something captivating about you, I just didn’t think that this arrogant ponce stood a chance, what with being arrogant and a ponce.”

“Whereas this embittered shrew knew she was perfect Lady Asherton material… not!”

“And now?”

“Sorry?”

“Do you now know that you’re perfect Lady Asherton material?”

“What are you asking me?”

“What do you think I’m asking you?”

“I’m not doing this again!”

“Doing what?”

“Grrr, answering a question with a question.”

“So I’ll ask you a question that can only be answered with one of two words. Barbara Havers; will you marry me?”


	6. Chapter 6

I waited for her to laugh, or to swear, or to come up with one hundred and one reasons why she could never marry me.

None of those things happened.

Instead, she smiled broadly and said one word. “Yes.”

As soon as I heard her answer something deep inside me settled. I felt lighter, almost healed.

A finger in the ribs brought me back down to earth.

“Oi! Are you just going to lie there looking like a stunned cod or are you going to say something?”

“A stunned cod? Oh Barbara, you say the sweetest things.”

“Yeah, like saying yes to your proposal. I’m still waiting for some sort of reaction from you, besides the stunned cod impressions.”

“I’m sorry for being a stunned cod, but you saying yes changed something within me.”

“Is this where you go all deep and mysterious on me?”

“No, this is where I tell you that I love you, that you make me the happiest I have ever been, and that I can’t wait for you to be my wife. Our life together is going to be a rollercoaster, but there’s no one I’d rather ride it with than you.”

“I don’t really like rollercoasters.”

“I’ll hold your hand, keep you safe.”

“You’re going soppy.”

“I am, and it’s all because of you.”

“So, now we’re engaged, what are we going to do to celebrate… where are you going?”

Sliding out of bed, I started to pull on my boxers.

“We need to get you a ring.”

“No, what you need to do is get back into this bed and make love to your fiancée.”

“But you need a ring.”

“No, what I need is you inside me.”

Tearing off the boxers I had only just stepped into, I climbed back into the bed, and gathered her to me.

“I promise I will get you a ring.”

“I know you will, but later. Much, much later.”


	7. Chapter 7

“No.”

“Barbara, this is the third ring you’ve turned down.”

“They were all too flashy.”

“By flashy, do you mean expensive?”

“That and you could see them all from space! I don’t need a giant rock that costs nearly as much as the national debt to know that you love me.”

“What about this one?”

“Barbara, really!”

“It’s small and understated.”

“If by small you mean you’d need the Hubble telescope to find the diamond then I agree. Look, I know you don’t want to be accompanied by armed guards every time you wear it out, but I want to get you a ring that shows the world how much you mean to me.”

“I don’t care about what the world knows. What matters is you and me. Our relationship. What we mean to each other.”

“You deserve everything I can give you and so much more.”

“That’s not what I want. I’m marrying you Tommy, not your bank account.”

“I’m sorry, I just want you to have the best of everything.”

“I already have that; I have you. Now, how about we go home, have some lunch, and then we can look at engagement rings online, find a style that we both like. Something subtle and reasonably priced. Something that I will be comfortable and proud to wear.”

“You always were the sensible one.”

“Not always. Standing in front of a loaded shotgun. Beating up a shotgun wielding psychopathic police constable.”

“The first was you thinking of others, something I’ve always admired about you. The second was down to your PTSD; and I wish more than anything you hadn’t had to go through what you did.”

“You can’t change the past, you can only make sure you don’t repeat the same mistakes. Right, my stomach thinks my throat’s been cut.”

“And we can’t have that. Let’s get you and your complaining stomach home.”


	8. Chapter 8

Holding my hand out in front of me, I studied my engagement ring, a massive smile on my face.

“It’s not going to disappear.”

“I know.”

“Honestly, you’re like a magpie.”

“You were saying… oooh, look, SHINY!”

He laughed heartily, “nutter!”

“I’m sorry it took me so long to decide on a ring.”

“Three months isn’t a long time.”

My eyebrow quirked so high it nearly ended up on the back of my head.

“Okay, so three months is an unusually long amount of time to pick an engagement ring, but we both wanted it to be the right one.”

“You were beginning to wonder if I would ever agree on one, weren’t you?”

“I was beginning to wonder if you were stalling.”

“If I didn’t want to marry you, I wouldn’t have said yes. You need to stop comparing our relationship to the one you shared with Helen; I’m not her.”

“I’m sorry I keep doing that.”

“Look Tommy, I was there, I saw what you and she went through. You and I, it’s a different relationship, we’re different together. We have to trust one another and talk to one another.”

“I do trust you, and even when I was with Helen, if anything happened, it was you I wanted to talk to, you I wanted to share it with.”

“I should never have pushed you two together.”

“You didn’t.”

“I did. You tried to kiss me, I started to realise what you meant to me, I ran scared, so I pointed you in her direction. When you were with her, I was safe.”

“When I was with her you were still the most important person in my life. That should have told me something.”

“It should have told us both something but, as I’ve said before, we can’t change the past, we can only make sure that we don’t repeat the same mistakes in the future.”

“This conversation is getting a little maudlin, I think we should change the subject.”

“What would you like to discuss instead?”

“Going down to Howenstow and telling Mother that we’re engaged.”

“Is this some weird aristocracy thing? Having to announce the engagement to the matriarch of the family in person?”

“No, I just want her to see my face when I tell her.”

“I’m not going to be used in power games between your family.”

“That’s not what I mean. I want to look her in the eyes as I say the words, and for her to see the truth in them. You make me happy and I’m a better man for being loved by you.”

“As long as that’s all it is.”

“I promise you.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter references the ILM fic [ 'Tea', written by Tricki](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6085979/1/Tea)

When I heard Tommy’s car pull up I fought against the urge to run outside and meet him and Barbara.

He’d called me to let me know that they were coming down for a visit, that they had news to share. As I already knew they were a couple, it could only be one of two things; they were engaged, or they were expecting. 

“Mother?”

“I’m in the family room.”

They appeared in the doorway, Tommy holding Barbara’s hand. I took a moment to study them. Tommy had lost the melancholy aura that always seemed to hang over him and Barbara seemed more confident in her skin. Argue though they did, the also brought out the best in each other.

“Tommy. Barbara. How wonderful to see you both. Did you have a good journey?”

“We did, thank you Dorothy, mainly because a certain earl made me get up at stupid o’clock so that we would miss the traffic.”

“Which we did, not that you would know as you were asleep for most of the journey.”

“If we’d hit traffic the swearing would have woken me.”

“Swearing Tommy?”

“He has an extensive and extremely earthy vocabulary.”

“The majority of which I picked up through the years of being partnered with you.”

“Pah! You may have had an expensive education, but you weren’t raised by nuns and monks!”

As they bickered back and forth, I looked on fondly and smiled. When Tommy had been growing up, before his father died at least, I would never have thought he would have ended up with a woman like Barbara. As snobby as it sounded, I had always thought that his match would be a woman of equal status and breeding. A woman like Helen.

I wasn’t ashamed to say that I had been mistaken.

Tommy needed a woman who would challenge him but would also stand up for him and support him. Someone who would love him completely, but not be afraid to tell him he was an idiot.

With Barbara he had all that and more.

“Can I get you two a coffee, or something to eat?”

“A coffee would be nice, but I’d rather wait until lunch for food. What about you Barbara.”

“I’d murder someone for a cup of tea.”

“Not anyone present I hope.”

“No Dorothy.”

“It’s a joke between us from a case we investigated a few years ago. At the end of the case, when Barbara and I returned to the office, she announced that she’d murder someone for a cup of tea.”

“So, Tommy left one on my desk with a post it note attached that read ‘in the interests of keeping you out of jail’.”

“Something we’ve done for each other since the day we met.”

“You’ve kept me out of jail, I’ve stopped you from throwing people off balconies. We’re a match made in heaven.”

“We are, which leads us to one of the reasons we’ve come to visit. Barbara and I have something to tell you Mother.”

“Which is?”

“We’re engaged.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful. I’m so happy for you both." I clapped my hands in delight. "Forget the tea and coffee; this calls for champagne.”


End file.
